Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Blue Whale Vodka Gummies

What people don't really understand when they first see me, I was part of green peace for roughly 20 years. One thing we used to do was go out to whaling ships and stop them from killing them innocent whales. Today I continue my journey on a smaller scale. Today we save a beached whale.
Of starboard you can clearly see a whale beached on the luxurious shores of cutting board island. We have to save them before someone tries to nuke them.

They aren't regular whales though, in fact they need fire water to be saved.
I was able to get them off of the beach and into a shipping container so we could bring them out to the middle of the sea.
We added just enough water to make sure they were 42 leagues under the sea, if not under the table.
Now we wait to see if it can live like this.
After 24 hours we had to check on them to make sure they were still alive.
We took a tiny tissue sample, but it seemed like they needed more time, instead of being on the beach.
So I put them back in for 36 hours and went back for another sample. Things are looking up.
It seems like we were not able to save them in time though. It got the rare whale rot. The only thing we could do it make sure they were put to good use.
We were able to extract some rare blue whale oil. It's the best of its kind. This will fuel many people's generators for years on end. We did our best, but the best wasn't enough. In all seriousness though, the waxy coating on the whales forced the delay of the gummies absorbing the vodka. It took about 36 hours for it to be complete, otherwise it was a little tough. After that though they gummies softened up, and were delicious.

The blue vodka left over was a little syrupy, but it had a nice flavour too it. If you can find them, it's not too bad to have, if you don't mind the wait.

Blue Whale Gummies: 2/5
Blue Whale Vodka: 3/5

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